Victors in the Battle for Sexual Integrity

I’m thrilled to introduce Teri White, an incredible advocate for sexual risk avoidance education. Teri works directly with schools, equipping students with tools for healthy decision-making, and has also developed a curriculum to help parents teach their children about sexual integrity. I had the pleasure of meeting Teri in person at a homeschool conference and was immediately drawn to her warm and engaging personality. As two retired homeschool moms now dedicated to guiding students toward healthier choices, we share a deep passion for this work. It’s an honor to share her insights in this post.

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E. Stanley Jones wrote, “Sex has produced more happiness and more unhappiness than any single thing in life. It all depends on what you do with it.”

These words crafted by Jones are on point. The battle for sexual integrity has been fought since the beginning of time by all individuals, young and old alike. Every person born on earth will, at some point, make the decision to live to the highest of moral standards about their own sexual behaviors or avoid it all together. Because this is a battle of great magnitude, it is imperative that individuals are prepared and equipped to face the struggle without fear. But how? How does one become combat ready and equipped to engage in the battle?

More importantly, how does one prepare their children to be conquerors in the battle for sexual integrity?

Instruction in sexual integrity has long been a taboo topic that often has been avoided. Parents have been apprehensive to discuss it for a multiplicity of reasons and some have completely avoided any semblance of this conversation with their children. Perhaps a parent did not hold to the highest of moral standards when they were a young person and are now embarrassed or shamed regarding their personal weaknesses and mistakes. Teachers, some of which are mandated by state boards of education, have been reluctant to talk about the truth of sexual integrity, often due to their own lack of knowledge, misunderstanding, and fear. Some churches have attempted to touch on the subject but not always in a positive manner.

"Youth will be exposed to issues of sexual integrity. Empower them to walk into the battle equipped." ~ Teri White, Victors in the Battle for Sexual Integrity #hopefulmom #healthyrelationships Share on X

Fast forward over time and the purity culture enters the scene. Although promoted by well-intentioned individuals with positive motives, the purity culture movement brought its own set of problems to the discussion. Teaching was readily conducted on what not to do regarding sexual behavior, yet rarely was teaching conducted on the beauty and benefits of positive sexual behaviors within a faithful and loving marriage. A disturbing narrative emerged that was based on shame rather than the beautiful intimacy that should be cultivated within a healthy marital relationship.

What was the result of the timidity and shame-based teaching? A lot of confusion which involved generations of people growing up ignorant and full of questions on how to navigate their emerging sexuality. Countless individuals learned about sexual integrity the hard way, by trial and error. This method of learning (or lack of learning) led to individuals making numerous mistakes which resulted in not so positive outcomes such as unintended pregnancy, disease, and/or emotional harm. Add in individuals that were introduced to abusive sexual behaviors against their will and as might be expected, another huge dynamic of problems ensued surrounding the battle of understanding sexual integrity.

Past culture may have been timid, but current culture is no longer quiet or shy about this topic. Sex is everywhere! It can be found in books, music, movies, video games, the advertising industry, and the social media on which everyone’s eyes are glued. If a young person (or old person for that matter) has a phone, iPad, or laptop they will be exposed to the issues of sexual integrity even if they are not intentionally searching. If a young person does not have a phone, iPad, or laptop they will be exposed to issues of sexual integrity from friends. The greatest travesty? These problems could be prevented. The dilemma goes back to the original question, “How does one become combat ready and equipped to become a victor in this battle?”

The answer is simple, Sexual Risk Avoidance Education.

AIM (Acknowledging Integrity Matters) is a Sexual Risk Avoidance (SRA) program designed to flip the switch on this subject and get parents, teachers, church members, and young people comfortable talking and learning about sex and the sexual integrity principles that desperately need to be instilled in all people. The current culture has twisted and distorted sex into something that was never intended. Humans were designed as sexual beings from the beginning. Even on a microscopic level our cells testify to the beautiful design of sex and intimacy.

The original design for sex was perfect and beautiful but only within the limitations of marriage between a husband and wife. When sex moved outside the boundary of marriage, it turned into something it was never meant to be. Ultimately, the Creator of the Universe designed this relationship to mirror Christ’s love for His church and the beautiful intimacy that was created by Him.

If you have a young person in your life, introduce them to this beautiful intimacy in a healthy manner that addresses sexual integrity from a holistic perspective. Empower them to walk into the battle equipped and as Jones wrote, help them to understand “what to do with it.” Give them the tools to make healthy decisions and aim them in the direction of being victors in the battle. If you would like more information about AIM, to schedule a speaking presentation, or to schedule a coaching session contact me at teri@stillwaterslife.com.

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