Understanding Archives

March 2, 2026February 27, 2026

Partnering to Protect Kids from Online Dangers

My good friend Sarah Siegand is with us again. She’s an expert at helping parents with their tech issues. She recently launched a book for student ministry leaders. In this post she reminds us that the Church is not immune from technology problems, so we should speak up and ask the Church to stand with us in this fight.

Research continues to prove that excessive screen time and exposure to harmful content have created a mental, emotional, and spiritual health epidemic among young people. From the former U.S. Surgeon General to congressional leaders across party lines, from Big Tech whistleblowers to grieving parents, the message is clear: our kids are in crisis.

February 2, 2026January 24, 2026

How to Help Your Teen Process Sexual Desire

I’m thrilled to introduce Ben Williams of 423 Communities. As the Director of Youth and Families – through 423 Next – he coaches teens, trains, and runs support groups. I love Ben’s heart and passion for teens and how he comes alongside them as someone who has been in their position. Ben offers great advice to parents in helping teens deal with sexual desire. I highly recommend checking out 423 Next here, especially if you have a teen struggling with pornography. By the way, 423 Next has a coach for girls, and I partner with 423 Communities to coach parents.

My Story

I vividly remember desiring privacy from my parents as a teenager. I would spend hours in my room watching YouTube, Netflix, and playing video games. When I was out with my family, I was not present. Instead of looking my parents in the eyes, I was looking down at my phone. Instead of listening to the conversation, I was listening to my headphones. Instead of talking to them, I was usually texting some girl from school.

January 5, 2026December 29, 2025

How Predators Groom Kids for Sex Trafficking Online

Sex trafficking doesn’t typically start with kidnapping. It starts with grooming. Predators build trust first. They use affection, attention, and manipulation to slowly convince preteens and teens that abuse is love, secrecy is normal, and speaking up will ruin lives.

Grooming for sex trafficking happens in person and online and is particularly prevalent on social media platforms. Pornography and sex trafficking are intertwined, so we must discuss signs and grooming techniques with our children.

I recently watched a reel on journalist Lori Fullbright’s Instagram that clearly explains how predators groom their victims. You can watch the reel here. The following transcript reveals phrases predators use to manipulate, isolate, and control children before trafficking begins.

December 15, 2025December 16, 2025

Catfishing: What It Is and How It Impacts Our Teens

When my daughter worked at a local pharmacy, older ladies often came in to purchase gift cards for their online friends. Management taught her to ask questions and try to convince customers not to buy the gift cards if their stories were suspicious. Inevitably, though, buyers defended their purchases. They insisted they knew their “friend” well and there was a definite need. My daughter recognized that most of these ladies were being swindled, but she rarely talked them out of spending money on someone they’d never met in person.

These precious ladies were catfished.

November 18, 2025November 18, 2025

It’s Not About You: Understanding Teens and Their Choices

“I can’t believe he’s doing this to me. He knows I hate when he watches porn.”

“She purposefully went behind my back and purchased a burner phone after I explicitly forbid any more screen time. She’s trying to drive me crazy.”

“My son ignored everything I told him and watched pornography even after I warned him about the dangers. He just wants to hurt me.”

Many parents have thoughts like these when they discover a child’s unwanted behavior—whether it’s watching inappropriate videos, ignoring screen time limits, or interacting with strangers online. We feel, at some point, as if our child stabbed us in the back.

November 3, 2025October 3, 2025

The Holistic Health Approach to Sex Education

I’m thrilled to introduce Tracey Pike, a leader in the Sexual Risk Avoidance Education field. When I met Tracey, I was immediately drawn to her passion for helping the next generation understand the importance of making healthy choices, especially as it pertains to their overall health.

Teens are influenced by peers, social media, and their home life. They’re stuck in a place where they desperately want to belong and yet want to carve their own path. Additionally, their brains aren’t fully developed, so they are easily swayed by whatever is appealing in the moment. They can be convinced that the choice they make today is inconsequential to their future and only affects one small area of their life. Hence, the belief that sexual activity, which they think is primarily physical, is no big deal. To combat this thinking, let’s change our approach to sex education in our homes.

In this article, Tracey helps us understand what holistic health is and why we should incorporate the concept into our children’s sex education at home as well as in the classroom.

October 20, 2025September 27, 2025

Porn vs. Healthy Sex: A Parent’s Guide

porn vs healthy sex banner at Hopeful Mom

The average age of first exposure to pornography is 8 to 12 years old. Many preteens and teens watch porn for their sex education. They are curious and wander into unknown territory they don’t comprehend.

Our job as parents is to educate our children about the harms of pornography, just as we would discuss the dangers of running in the street, touching a hot stove, or taking someone else’s prescription drugs. Yet, it’s not as effective to simply forbid certain behaviors; we should also explain benefits of healthy sexual activity.

I often tell students, “We want you to have a healthy, thriving sex life . . . Not today. At the right time with the right person.”

October 6, 2025October 29, 2025

Eww: 5 Tips for Cyber Hygiene

As a Cybersecurity Instructor, Research Scientist, and Teacher, Barb Fox knows about technology and how to explain safety in a tech world to parents and students. I love, love the analogy she presents in order for us to understand cyber hygiene.

My children loved searching for treasures. I humored them as they scoured parking lots for coins or waded in creeks to find rusty bicycle wheels. But when it came to public restrooms, that was a different story. Pennies and abandoned toys stayed on the floor. Every time we went into a public bathroom, I reminded them about what was safe to touch and what was not. Those public places also prompted lessons on privacy. Close the door. Lock the door. And don’t peek where you shouldn’t peek.

These same precious kids need similar “cyber hygiene” training to protect their safety and privacy in the digital world.

September 15, 2025September 7, 2025

The Advocate Every Child Needs

“In 2022, my just turned 15-year-old daughter met someone on an app who posed as a 16-year-old.” I read this on Facebook. This mom continued explaining her story which lasted over two years. Her daughter had an eight-month long “relationship” with this poser before breaking it off. From that point, he exploited, stalked, harassed, and bullied the daughter and family.

When the daughter told her mother about this “friend,” this mom went into “mom mode.” You know what I mean—some Mama Bear action, defending, plotting, advocating, and all-out persisting.

Mom spent over a year trying to protect her daughter from this relentless person. He “used at least four social media platforms and 130 social media display names to pose as a minor and interact with minors on social media.” [i] This man, who was actually 21, not 16, repeatedly contacted and threatened the daughter and her family, even after her mother had called the police and Attorney General and filed a restraining order against him.

A mom fights for her child to protect her from a predator. As parents, we are called to protect and advocate for our children. The Advocate Every Child Needs #hopefulmom #parenting Share on X Continue reading

September 1, 2025September 2, 2025

Heidi Olson, Pediatric Nurse, Talks About Pornography and Child Sexual Assault

Note from Barb : I highly respect Heidi Olson and the work she does as a sexual assault nurse examiner. I asked her to educate us on the connection between pornography and child sexual assault because we need to know. While this information is disturbing, we can’t ignore it. A huge thank you to Heidi and others like her in the trenches with our children helping, protecting, and educating. Warning: This article contains information about child-on-child sexual assault and various themes in pornography.

Disclaimer from Heidi: I try not to use the word perpetrator when talking about children with problematic sexual behaviors, because they are victims of a predatory porn industry, their brains are still developing, and often do not understand the full ramification of their choices, and while this doesn’t negate harm they’ve caused, the issue of child-on-child sexual assault is extremely complex.

Who Are the Offenders?

When I became a pediatric sexual assault nurse examiner, I had a stereotype in my mind of what a perpetrator would look like. Predators conjure up an image of a creepy old man in a white van who lures children to him with kittens and candy. But the reality of what is happening to children is much more disturbing than I could have imagined. About a decade ago, I started to notice a pattern that many of the sex offenders weren’t old men (although those predators certainly exist), but they were actually children and teenagers (and these were instances of real sexual harm, not normal sexual development or curiosity).