What Grandparents Don’t Know About Online Safety Can Hurt Your Kids

what grandparents don't know about online safety

Sometimes we’re so focused on keeping our home safe for our kids, we forget they’re interacting with devices elsewhere – like at their grandparents’ (or other relatives’) house.

When my son was sixteen, he confessed to his father and me (for the second time) that he had a pornography problem. Through his prompting and with his approval, we added boundaries and safeguards.

New restrictions included locked down computers and no devices in bedrooms. Again, our son was fully on board with these regulations, as well as many others.

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The Crisis of Comparison

I’m thrilled to introduce Stephanie Catmull. She’s a therapist and mom, so she understands the challenges of parenting preteens and teens in this technological age. Additionally, Stephanie is caring and personable. It’s a privilege to call her friend. She’s here to help us understand the crisis of comparison our children face every day. I’m sure you will find some helpful information in her message.

“Hey, Mom. How come we never go on vacation during Spring Break like all my friends?”

“Hey, Dad. Look at the car my best friend got for his birthday!”

“She’s so much prettier than me. I wish I had her hair and her clothes and her body.”

“No one ever likes my posts. Just goes to show how unpopular I am.”

“Everyone but me has a life.”

Crisis of comparison leads to unhealthy depression and anxiety in our teens, and us, when we believe we’re “less than” everyone else. Teens, especially, are vulnerable because they’re at a crucial—and normal—stage of development where they’re trying to figure out their sense of self. During this time, parents’ influence fades, and peers’ effects magnify. They observe each other’s popularity, looks, beliefs, friends, values, athletics, academics, and activities to see who they want to be, and how to get there.

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