Blog - Page 7 of 14 - HOPEFUL MOM

August 22, 2022February 16, 2024

Do Internet Filters Really Prevent Children from Seeing Pornography?

Our home owner association recently put a locked fence around the amenities in our neighborhood. We have a pool, a sports area, and a small playground for young ones and their families. Our fees pay for the upkeep and allow us these perks. Each home received a fob for our key chain, which unlocks the fence and allows us into these “members only” places.

August 8, 2022August 10, 2022

8 Tips to Addressing Masturbation with Kids

I’m thrilled to have John Fort of Be Broken Ministries back with us. This time he’s talking about masturbation. I have to admit this subject is still difficult for me to address, so I’m grateful John is willing to give us some suggestions. Read to the end for more resources, and check out his bio for information regarding his newly-revised book.

When I speak to parents on subjects related to talking with kids about sex or pornography, I always know I will be asked one question during Q&A. That question is, “What are we supposed to say about masturbation?” Before I answer, my own question would be, what is it about masturbation that seems to cause so much anxiety among Christian parents? I believe parents carry some level of baggage related to their own past that plays into fears about their kids.

July 25, 2022July 16, 2022

Understanding Triggers in Pornography Use

“Why did you make this decision? And why do you keep going back when you know it’s harmful?” Most parents ask these questions when learning about a child’s indiscretions or habitual behavior. We are trying to discern their triggers.

In a previous post, we defined triggers as “anything, as an act or event, that serves as a stimulus and initiates or precipitates a reaction or series of reactions.”[i] In other words, a trigger is an outside stimulus that activates internal turmoil. In that post, we explored triggers parents face after learning of a child’s struggle with pornography.

In this post, we’ll examine the user’s triggers—to watch pornography or run to any type of vice or behavior to seek immediate comfort.

July 11, 2022July 1, 2022

Do Girls Actually Watch Pornography?

These amazing ladies caught my eye on Instagram. Their bold messages, desire to see girls set free from porn addiction, and, frankly, their great reels, are superb. Be sure to stop by their IG account and hit follow. I’m so grateful they agreed to talk with us about girls and pornography. I’m sure you’ll find their story and advice invaluable.

Katie and Amanda became best friends in 9th grade when they awkwardly sat next to each other in drama class. A deep friendship quickly formed, and they spent almost every moment together. As close as these friends were, there was one massive secret both of them were keeping: They were secretly battling pornography addictions and wouldn’t tell each other until their freshman year of college.

June 27, 2022June 23, 2022

What Are Triggers?

My heart raced. My breathing shallowed and quickened. My thoughts were on high alert, throwing cautionary signals at me faster than I could process them. The room narrowed. I looked for an escape, a way to flee the situation I had encountered.

I was triggered.

June 13, 2022December 7, 2023

The Impact of a Parent’s Pornography Use on Children

I’m excited to have Kristin Cary here with us. Kristin is the co-founder of Living Truth, Inc. and she has a message for us on understanding how a parent’s pornography use can impact a child. Kristin and her husband, Michael, have a gift for you—two free guides. See the end of the post for details.

Hi I’m Kristin! I was in full-time ministry when my first marriage ended due to infidelity and sex addiction in 2006. My son was just 10 months old at the time. It felt like the pain would destroy me. Little was understood about sex addiction and betrayal trauma at the time, and I endured a lot of misunderstanding, shame, and blame. I was a single mother for almost five years, working really hard at my recovery during that time. An amazing Christian therapist and a recovery community that had walked similar paths before me were key elements in breathing hope and joy into my life again.

May 30, 2022November 16, 2023

Understanding Teens: It’s Not Rocket Science, It’s Brain Science

Have you ever wondered why your child makes irrational or illogical decisions? No matter how many times you’ve explained the consequences of a negative choice, your words appear to go in one ear and out the other. When a peer suggests they ride bikes in a construction zone, stay up late playing online games, or look at pornographic videos, their sense of reasoning disappears. Part of the answer has to do with brain science.

When my son felt a compulsion to watch pornography (was, in fact, addicted), I didn’t understand the pull. If he comprehended the dangers, why did he go back to it over and over? It was only after I researched the addictive nature of pornography and the brain science behind addictions that I caught a glimpse of his dilemma.

You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to understand brain science.

May 16, 2022May 16, 2022

10 Tips to Difficult Conversations with Teens and Adult Children

I’m thrilled to introduce guest author, Dawn Ward. I met Dawn through a friend. Her website, The Faith to Flourish, is for women with loved ones struggling with addiction, mental health issues and life-destructive behaviors. As a seasoned parent, Dawn has wisdom for us about talking with our teens and adult children.

It’s difficult to talk to our children when the topics of our conversations make one or both parties squirm. I should know. I have raised two sons who struggled with addiction and destructive behaviors when they were teens and young adults. When they were kids, I could get by with a quick, “Because I said so” as an answer to their requests. Once those words came out of my mouth, they knew the discussion was over. End of argument.

April 18, 2022April 24, 2022

Vulnerable Conversations Lead to Openness

Being authentic with our children through vulnerable conversations —sharing our stories, our failures, our successes, our hopes, and our fears—bridges the invisible gap between generations. It demonstrates to our children we are fallible, but also resilient.

April 11, 2022March 31, 2022

Get Off the Fence: Three Ways to Get Unstuck

I am beyond excited that Marilyn Evans of Parents Aware is here again to offer her words of wisdom to parents. Marilyn is my good friend and mentor. She has taught me so much about pornography and parenting. I love her hopeful attitude. Marilyn recently launched a course for parents, to help them get off the fence and talk with their children about this important topic. Read to the end for my review of the course and how you can find it.

You’re here. That’s amazing! It tells me you already know why it’s important to talk to your child about pornography. I bet you’re also keenly aware this conversation is not a one-time deal. You’ve figured out that every age and stage of development presents new challenges for your child online.