protect Archives - HOPEFUL MOM

February 19, 2024February 17, 2024

A Millennial Talks About Internet Filters, Pornography, and Addiction

“I was first introduced to online sexting with strangers when I was 12 years old through an online video game on my computer.” Austin Couture, now 29, eventually developed an addiction. “I could not stop seeking out pornography and women to chat with online or the obsessive and compulsive masturbation that always went along with it. At one of my lowest points, I felt isolated, alone, confused, faulty and irreparably broken. I believed that I was an emotionless, guilt-ridden zombie that was forever cursed to live in despair with these sexual secrets.”[1] Austin and I met at a Sexual Integrity Leadership Summit and connected further when I was a guest on his podcast. I asked Austin to give us some insight from his perspective on addiction, talking, and using an internet filter. He had the following advice:

December 4, 2023December 2, 2023

Planning for the Holiday Break

Your kids have two weeks off for the holiday break and you’re worried. What will they do? How will they spend their time? Will everyone get along? And, will they stay out of trouble?

Long breaks are bittersweet. We love the extra time with our children, but the lack of routine can make for difficult days. So, before school lets out and families gather, make some plans. Plan how your children will spend their days, and plan to protect their devices.

June 26, 2023July 9, 2023

5 Phases of Tech Training

I’m so excited to introduce you to my friend, Sarah Siegand. Sarah and I met through Safeguard Alliance. I love her enthusiasm and desire to help parents learn about technology. I know you will find her post on tech training informative and motivating. (She didn’t mention it in her bio, so I will . . . She wrote a book! Find it here.)

Technology isn’t going anywhere, and today’s parents need a solid strategy for how their families will either embrace or reject the influence of tech. If the goal is to raise kids who are not enslaved to technology, we must have a long and a short view of intentional strategies at every age and stage. It requires us to train them!

The following phases will help you locate where you are in the training process for each individual child or teen you’re parenting and what skills you will need to build next.

November 24, 2022November 21, 2022

Not My Kid – Online Safety

It’s a privilege to have Jen Hoey of Not My Kid here to talk with us about protecting children online. This is an appropriate topic as we head into the holiday season. If you are contemplating purchasing a device for your child for Christmas, pay special attention to Jen’s suggestions and read to the end for my recommendations on a first phone and filters.

“I did not for a moment think something like this could ever happen to my child. But it did, despite my vigilance.” This is the opening paragraph of the book I wrote about my daughter’s experience with an online predator. This event changed the trajectory of my life and was the catalyst for me getting involved in the prevention of online child exploitation by empowering parents through education as a Cyber Safety Parent Consultant.

The issue of online safety raises many responses from parents, but the most frequent I hear is “not my kid” or “my child will be left out.”

September 6, 2021September 6, 2021

Protecting Your Castle

When I first saw Rachelle’s castle, I was impressed. I think it’s an inspiring way to illustrate how to protect your home and your children from pornography. Even though parenting in a digital world cannot end with filters and parental controls (difficult conversations are a must!), I’m so grateful Rachelle is joining us here to straighten us out and explain these levels of protection. ~Barb

According to a study cited in Andy Crouch’s fantastic book The Tech-Wise Family: Everyday Steps for Putting Technology in Its Proper Place, technology is the number one reason parents believe raising kids is more complicated than it was in the past. Between being concerned about what our kids are seeing to worrying about how much time they are spending on devices, it can feel like we are fighting a losing battle. Plus, technology is constantly changing and staying on top of what is out there can be confusing, overwhelming, and challenging.

June 28, 2021June 29, 2021

Understanding Daughters and Pornography

I am super excited to introduce this guest. Jessica Harris, author of Beggar’s Daughter: From the Rags of Pornography to the Riches of Grace, has an amazing reputation as one of the first women to speak up about her pornography problem – paving the way for other women to come clean. Through her website and speaking engagements, she equips women who struggle with pornography and helps parents of daughters understand this is not just a male issue. I admire Jessica and her willingness to be a leader in this area. I’m sure you will glean some great information from this article.

I first found pornography when I was 13 years old. What started as honest research for school, became a defining moment in my life. As I scrolled through scientific video clips, a dark thumbnail caught my eye. I clicked on it and stared in awe and terror at the scenes of violent hardcore pornography playing in front of me. When I attempted to close the window, more popped up. Within minutes, I was ushered onto a webpage filled with hardcore pornography, and my world forever changed.

August 30, 2020August 30, 2020

Not My Child’s Job to Protect Me

I saw the questioning look in his eyes. I interpreted it as, “Should I tell her? How will she respond?” I had seen that look in his sister’s eyes before, too. It typically appeared when there was something that needed to be said but no one wanted to be the one to upset mom. Someone put a scratch in the floor when they dropped a utensil. A red sock turned the white clothes pink. (Okay, I made that up. We’re not particular about the laundry, and this has never happened to me.) One son backed into the other son’s vehicle. Bad news. Upsetting information. An incriminating tale.