supporting parents in an online world
My heart raced. My breathing shallowed and quickened. My thoughts were on high alert, throwing cautionary signals at me faster than I could process them. The room narrowed. I looked for an escape, a way to flee the situation I had encountered.
Continue reading “What Are Triggers?”
I’m excited to have Kristin Cary here with us. Kristin is the co-founder of Living Truth, Inc. and she has a message for us on understanding how a parent’s pornography use can impact a child. Kristin and her husband, Michael, have a gift for you—two free guides. See the end of the post for details.
Hi I’m Kristin! I was in full-time ministry when my first marriage ended due to infidelity and sex addiction in 2006. My son was just 10 months old at the time. It felt like the pain would destroy me. Little was understood about sex addiction and betrayal trauma at the time, and I endured a lot of misunderstanding, shame, and blame. I was a single mother for almost five years, working really hard at my recovery during that time. An amazing Christian therapist and a recovery community that had walked similar paths before me were key elements in breathing hope and joy into my life again.
Continue reading “The Impact of a Parent’s Pornography Use on Children”
Have you ever wondered why your child makes irrational or illogical decisions? No matter how many times you’ve explained the consequences of a negative choice, your words appear to go in one ear and out the other. When a peer suggests they ride bikes in a construction zone, stay up late playing online games, or look at pornographic videos, their sense of reasoning disappears. Part of the answer has to do with brain science.
When my son felt a compulsion to watch pornography (was, in fact, addicted), I didn’t understand the pull. If he comprehended the dangers, why did he go back to it over and over? It was only after I researched the addictive nature of pornography and the brain science behind addictions that I caught a glimpse of his dilemma.
You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to understand brain science.
Continue reading “Understanding Teens: It’s Not Rocket Science, It’s Brain Science”
I’m thrilled to introduce guest author, Dawn Ward. I met Dawn through a friend. Her website, The Faith to Flourish, is for women with loved ones struggling with addiction, mental health issues and life-destructive behaviors. As a seasoned parent, Dawn has wisdom for us about talking with our teens and adult children.
It’s difficult to talk to our children when the topics of our conversations make one or both parties squirm. I should know. I have raised two sons who struggled with addiction and destructive behaviors when they were teens and young adults. When they were kids, I could get by with a quick, “Because I said so” as an answer to their requests. Once those words came out of my mouth, they knew the discussion was over. End of argument.
Continue reading “10 Tips to Difficult Conversations with Teens and Adult Children”
Being authentic with our children through vulnerable conversations —sharing our stories, our failures, our successes, our hopes, and our fears—bridges the invisible gap between generations. It demonstrates to our children we are fallible, but also resilient.
Continue reading “Vulnerable Conversations Lead to Openness”
How do we comfort those who are grieving? And how do we process our own grief? For many of us, our pulse quickens and our palms sweat when we think about grief—ours or that of someone we know. We dodge the situation as much as possible.
I don’t attend funerals. They’re awkward. I don’t know what to say, and I don’t know how to act. I’m nervous about seeing a dead body, and I’m fearful of tripping over my words while interacting with the family. I assume I’m not comfortable in this situation because I haven’t suffered the death of anyone extremely close to me.
I recently finished reading The Freedom Fight and was impressed with how the author, Ted Shimer, addresses pornography addiction. The Freedom Fight has developed a thorough program for addressing the issue. I highly recommend reading the extensive book and perusing their website. I was so excited that Andrew, Director of Coaching and Onboarding, agreed to write a post for Difficult Conversations. But I was ecstatic when he offered to also give a book to one of our readers. Be sure to read to the end of the post to find out how you can enter the drawing to win a book.
When speaking with parents, there are two groups I interact with most: parents who have caught their kids watching porn and parents who don’t know their kids are secretly watching it. In today’s world, it is easier for an eleven-year-old with a smartphone to access porn lying in bed than to get a glass of water because getting a glass of water requires them to get out of bed. The reality is porn is pervasive, destructive, and addictive. We, as parents, need to be intentional about having ongoing conversations because if we don’t, the world is happy to fill in the blanks for our kid’s questions.
Continue reading “GIVEAWAY! + 5 Keys to Parenting in a Pornified World”
I’m thrilled to introduce Lauren Crews. I asked her to talk with us parents about her observations as a teacher. Wow! I definitely learned a few things. I hope you are enlightened and inspired to keep talking.
As a public-school teacher, I’m in a unique position and privy to behaviors parents often don’t see, and I overhear some startling conversations. The struggle is: What do I do? Do I confront the student? Do I tell the parent? Do I keep it to myself? I would love to share with the parents what I know, but I’m bound to respect the privacy of all my students. I also cannot assume we share the same moral standards, so I am often viewed as a busybody. I also wrestle with privacy issues. To what extent does privacy extend to a child? There’s the rub.
Continue reading “A Teacher’s Perspective”
What is online grooming for sex trafficking? Are our children at risk?
Why is it important to talk about this subject here at Hopeful Mom? Because the demand for pornography motivates traffickers. Those who watch pornography contribute to human trafficking. And our children are not only potential consumers of pornography, but also potential targets for sex traffickers. Yes, our children and their friends are potential targets.
Continue reading “Is My Child at Risk for Online Grooming?”
I’m thrilled to introduce Antoinette Villarreal, creator and host of the InHumane Podcast, HotPie Media, LLC. Antoinette is dynamic and passionate about protecting children from human trafficking. She and I talked on her podcast, and I was inspired and motivated by her zeal. I love her message and vibrant personality. I’m grateful she stopped by during Human Trafficking Awareness Month to chat with us about this tragedy happening in our own backyards.
What would you do to protect your loved ones from a predator? Are there any limits? How would you prepare you and yours to prevent being a target to these monsters? How do we prepare our children and other young people from being forced, coerced, or lured by fraudulent promises?
Continue reading “Human Trafficking Awareness: What would you do to protect your loved ones from a predator?”