hope Archives - HOPEFUL MOM

April 3, 2023March 28, 2023

Mom, I See You

As a young mom, I wrestled with thoughts that I wasn’t enough. I didn’t purchase the right clothes or decipher my children’s needs correctly. I wasn’t contributing to the household income or spending enough time raising my children. The meals were inadequate and the house wasn’t clean. If I sat with the children to play a game, supper was late. If I spent too much time reading to them, they may not learn necessary life skills. The never-ending tug and pull in my mind. Can you relate? Mom, I see you.

November 1, 2021October 27, 2021

This Boy Is Me: Smith Alley’s Story

I am overly excited to introduce Smith Alley, a high school student boldly talking about the effects of pornography and social media on youth today. I asked Smith Alley to write a guest post because I believe it’s vital we understand what our children are facing. His willingness to self-identify as someone who struggled with porn at a young age is courageous and inspiring. If you want to hear more from Smith, check out his presentation, Peeking Through the Eyes of Youth.

I have a product that will make you happier than the day before. Day in and day out without fail. Are you interested? I hate to tell you this product isn’t something you can add into your Amazon shopping cart with one click. It won’t be found at your local grocery store and isn’t even sold at the largest of Costco’s.

February 8, 2021February 8, 2021

6 Truths to Comfort Hurting Families in a Broken World and a GIVEAWAY!

It’s my privilege to introduce Dena Yohe, award winning author of You Are Not Alone: Hope for Hurting Parents of Troubled Kids. I met Dena at a writers conference and was immediately attracted to her calm, warm demeanor and soothing voice. Dena has been a hurting parent and runs a ministry designed to comfort hurting parents. I’ve learned much from her words of wisdom, and I pray you glean some understanding from her post.

GIVEAWAY – I am giving away Dena’s book! See bottom of post for drawing information.

We live in a broken world full of hurting families. This reality hit hard several years ago when my peaceful Sunday morning was harshly interrupted by tragic news. A mass shooting had occurred the night before at a local downtown night club called The Pulse. 49 people were reported dead, 53 wounded. When I heard about the incidence, I was still reeling from more sad news I’d heard twenty-four hours earlier. Christina Grimmie, a young Christian singer (a recent participant on the television program, The Voice) had been shot and killed by a fan following a performance. My thoughts were immediately drawn to the bereaved parents of all these victims.

November 17, 2020November 17, 2020

A Safe Rebellion

I’m excited to introduce Christy Bass Adams. We met recently at a writers conference. When I told her I was writing a book for parents of children struggling with pornography, she said, “I was that kid.” I immediately knew I wanted her to guest post here for us. Even though Christy grew up in a different era, I believe hearing the thoughts and trials of the addicted child is helpful. Christy says her addiction was a safe rebellion. I hope her insight gives us some perspective from the other side so we can be better parents. And, mostly, I hope her recovery as an adult reminds us our children’s stories are not over. They can still heal, even if it’s not in our timing. ~ Barb

A Safe Rebellion

I was 12 years old when I first viewed pornography at a friend’s house. The curiosity only grew from there. A child of the 80’s and 90’s, the internet wasn’t really a thing yet, so late night cable programming, printed material, and email spam were the easy avenues to seek it out. Thankfully I lived in a safe home where my parents monitored TV programming and everything else we did. So it remained only a curiosity for a long time.

March 30, 2020May 24, 2020

Hope During the Coronavirus Quarantine: You Can Do It!

I want to encourage you to stay strong.

Many of us are home with our kids because of the Coronavirus quarantine. Our routines have been turned upside down and our comfort zone has been pierced. One of the biggest questions on my mind (and possibly yours) is: Will this change cause my child to turn back to their addiction?

December 12, 2018July 16, 2020

Get Involved with the Fight Against Pornography?

Since discovering my son’s addiction I have wrestled with the question of whether to get involved with the fight against pornography. Or rather, what my response should be to this growing epidemic. There is an X-rated store (Is that what you call it?) three miles from our home. (How these places stay in business with all the online stuff is beyond me.) Every time I pass it, my blood pressure rises, and I pray it will go out of business. Well, on good days, I pray it will go out of business. On bad days, my prayer isn’t that pretty.

October 25, 2018December 29, 2023

Triggers

I felt my back pocket. It wasn’t there.

I looked in my purse. It wasn’t there.

I looked in the console of the van. It wasn’t there either.

I had left my phone at home. Ugh! My heart raced a little at the thought. Continue reading “Triggers”

September 29, 2018March 13, 2024

Are Our Children Victims?

Our home is a Christian home. We try to adhere to Christian principles. We teach our children right and wrong behavior. We openly tell them not to look at inappropriate photos or videos online.

For example, when I found out one of our older son’s peers had been caught sexting, I flipped out. I sat my older children down and made sure they understood that type of behavior would not be tolerated. They assured me they wouldn’t be involved in anything of the kind. And I believed them. I trusted them. (Although, I’m sure the fact that I was alarmed did not help them see me as someone they could trust.)

September 19, 2018March 13, 2024

Live in the Light of Truth

Seventeen months after my son’s first confession, he approached us. “Mom, Dad, can I talk to you a minute privately?” Words no parent wants to hear. But they began our journey to live in the light.

He said, “Remember that thing we talked about before? Well, I never really stopped.” What!? Continue reading “Live in the Light of Truth”

September 10, 2018September 19, 2020

11 Things To Do When You Discover Your Child is Watching Pornography

Photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash

The purpose of this site is to encourage parents of teenagers/children who watch or have watched pornography. It’s meant to be a safe place to share our emotions and concerns, not necessarily a place to give specific instruction on what to do. I am not an expert on the ins and outs of the pornography industry and how people become addicted to it. However, after walking through it with my son I would like to offer a list of 11 action steps in the hopes I can calm some fears. Sometimes, in the midst of a traumatic experience, it’s helpful to do something. Continue reading “11 Things To Do When You Discover Your Child is Watching Pornography”