My 26-year-old had an issue but is doing well now . . .
My son wrote me a long letter explaining his predicament . . .
A family in our congregation is dealing with this right now . . .
My 31-year-old has had problems. I’m not sure how he’s doing . . .
I just found out my college-aged daughter . . .
I’m raising my grandson who deals with this problem . . .
I heard these comments while attending a conference recently. Some wanted to talk further about the issues their child had or has had with pornography. Some simply mentioned their struggle in passing. A few have children who now walk in freedom from their habit. A few are still in the midst. But all these parents and grandparents followed their initial statement with, “Thank you.”
Thank you for talking about pornography, nudes, and other problems our preteens and teens encounter online. . . . Thank you for Hopeful Mom. . . . Thank you for Sexpectations.
These discussions reminded me how pervasive pornography is and the number of households impacted by its slithering fingers. While society dictates that we should not open the door to conversations, parents want to share their burdens. They need to talk about the elephant in the room, the issues invading their space, hurting their children, and wrecking their homes.
I heard "thank you" numerous times at a recent conference. Parents want to share their burdens. They need to talk about the issues invading their space, hurting their children, and wrecking their homes. Thank You #hopefulmom… Click To TweetHope and Prevention
And, besides helping the already wounded, can we prevent pornography and other online invasive concerns from harming additional children and families simply by talking about it?
We cannot ignore this problem any longer. Statistics tell us that most youth are exposed to pornography before age 18. We aren’t doing the next generation any favors by tiptoeing, pretending, or ignoring.
One dad and I were chatting about porn’s easy accessibility. I offered to speak at a parent organization he’s involved in. When he pitched the idea, one mom stated she was leery because sometimes sharing information with our children puts ideas into their heads. I hear this frequently, and I understand the objection. I subscribed to this thought once upon a time. However, we don’t take this stance when warning our children about the dangers of running into a street, touching a hot stove, or taking drugs.
If we think about it in relation to other cautions, we understand how presenting risks before our children face them can be beneficial. They will know how to respond, how to resist. They will be armed with the weapons necessary to defeat the enemy named pornography.
And, most importantly, they will know they can bring their problems—any problem—to us because they recognize we are willing to talk about the hard things.
Be the first person to talk with your child about pornography, nudes, sex, and sexuality. Take the initiative.
Break down the walls keeping us silent. Talk with a friend, counselor, or pastor about struggles within your home.
Again, I want to thank YOU, friend, for your encouraging words. Because of your support, I keep talking. The message is reaching other parents, grandparents, leaders, and educators. We are making a difference.
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About the author
For more about Barb, visit the About page. For information on Barb's book, Sexpectations: Helping the Next Generation Navigate Healthy Relationships, visit the Book page.